Crunch Time

Got my game face on.
Is it ever going to get any easier to move?!?  I have to be quite frank... I'm sick of boxes, cleaning, messes, disorder, and my home being a general state of upside down.  Then, I will move and it will be another couple months or so of settling in, only to move again in who knows how long.   I feel homeless.  Rebellious. Fleshly. Grrrrrr....

Paul handles it better than me.  Task oriented, hard working, hopeful and optimistic.

BTW... He is a Major today! 

The boys pack up their room, but need lots of my reminding them to stay on task.  Get the job done!

I swear I'm getting a whip for next time we move. 

The girls try to "pack" but when they're not looking I dump it all out and do it right.  I tried to teach Ann this time, but she just wants to pack everyone else's stuff and not hers.

I had two nights in a row of sleepovers for the kids' friends.  At one point I had 12 children.  Is that legal?Made home-made chocolate covered pretzels. I sprinkle sea salt on top while they're cooling.  So good.  The kids all loved them.

Always time to eat some baby belly.

Always time for FUN!... and to give my 80 pound son a ride.  I've been playing "Laugh Your Way to A Better Marriage" while we pack.  Mostly so Paul can over hear it too. Tee!Hee!

Cuddling in the wee mornings.

The girls and I went to a fantabulous wedding for a friend that, 

of course, we have to say good-bye too.

Today the kids and I will go to the Center for a couple of hours.  Elijah needs to practice  his drumming before Music Camp and can you believe I still have things to do.  Then I will take David and Elijah to their friends' house for the last time.  Good-byes, again, and again, and again.

Paul and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary on Monday.  We couldn't get a babysitter, but are going to try and do something Friday night.  We'll see.  I did cook up a great big steak dinner and stuffed mushrooms. 

Yesterday, I got my Food Handler's Card.  And now I am frantically studying for my Class B License.  I feel disappointed that I only got 75% of my Trainee Checklist done for this year.  It is so discouraging to be asked and expected to do SO many things that would really only be possible if I didn't have a husband and children to care for.   It's like being told to split the atom, I could try real hard, but I just couldn't do it, without blowing up myself and those around me.   Frustrating!! to say the least.     I am trusting that my life, spiritual witness, and character are better because of my commitment to my family and I hope that influences my ministry far more than a set of tasks.   I just want to be competent too! 

I am so excited for our new appointment.  I honestly didn't think I was going to make it.  But during tough times that we have experienced over the years, I just tell God, "I'll give it my all today, but tomorrow, I'm quiting".  And do you know what?  Tomorrow never happens.  Each day holds new mercy for me.  New compassion stirred in my heart.    God is beyond faithful and so very loving to me.  I am so undeserving.

A wise man once said

"you can have anything in life
if you will sacrifice everything else for it."



What It's Really Like

So, I've really put off posting on what it's really like since we stepped into our new appointment as ARC Trainees, (for drug and alchohol addiction) training to become ARC Administrators next summer.  Several times, I've started a post and then stopped.  I aim to be honest, but haven't always come from the best or realistic places.  A running theme for me for awhile was feeling so trapped in a lot of ways, even my husband's livelihood and ministry depending on my compliance as an Officer and wife.  But I'm having more peace about it now.  I still feel the "blood and fire" and I'm not letting anything stop me from obeying and serving the Lord the best I know how. 

     While I love a new adventure,  moving is still hard and unless you've *been there, done that* it is hard to truly grasp.  Leaving behind friends, memories, and years of hard work and hope.  Not to mention just the logistics of finding where things are, packing/unpacking, establishing new healthcare, changing all the addresses, making new relationships, and so much more.  Ugh!  It's especially hard for me when I talk myself into feeling like the stupidest person on the planet for allowing someone else to make life decisions for me and my children.     I am trusting like never before...  I thought I've surrendered it all only to find that yet... there is MORE!  I guess we never truly "arrive" anywhere except in the place that makes us wholeheartedly trust Him and rely on Him.    And life is so sweet right now!  It makes little logical sense, but here it is all sweet and solid and good ... amidst the busy-ness, challenges, temptations, and unexpected turns.  Thank you Lord for your amazing ways.

There's more...  
     I was praying for months and months for God to give me a passion for the addicted.  And then, I realized, or rather, God   spelled- it- out for me, that I already have a passion for people.  Especially the marginalized.  Injustice is my hot button, ever since I was little.   It just so happens that my new ministry will be to a more specific group.  I am trying to learn how best to minister to them,  whatever small part I might play.    Everyone else seems so much better qualified, but I am learning from them and seeking God's ways.
And surely, since God orchestrated all of this, I belong.

And more...
     I love our house.  This is my favorite Quarters out of 4.  It's got 3 big bedrooms, 2 bathrooms right next to eachother, an eat-in kitchen, dining room and living room.  It totally works for us.  There is also a guest apartment downstairs that has been frequented enough to aid my lonely heart.
     We walk all over the place here.  I walk to the beach, the forest park, several playgrounds, markets, shopping centers, Walgreens, etc.  I have always wanted to live in a place that I can walk everywhere I need to get.  Thanks for the freebie God.

     The children are such troopers!  Elijah had one breakdown of missing The Dalles after getting a letter from a friend.  Hannah and Ann have had a few, but the overall tone has been -- this is one great adventure!
Paul came up with the great idea of making and posting our Camp Chouinard poster since this is really just a transitional move and the kids are already anticipating the next one.  Despite a very frustrating and mess of a problem with the children's education, they are all settled and doing fantastic with their learning.
     We have had the most un-stressful Thanksgiving/Christmas season ever- ministry speaking.  Seriously, since I was a teenager in the Corps.    I hardly know what to do with myself because I'm only going in 10 different directions instead of 50.  I am savoring this.  It will probably never happen again until retirement. And by then I'll have my Officer children's families to help. Smile.
     I live the closest to my family and childhood friends than I have in over 15 years!  I have already seen my family 3 times, one of which was on my dad's birthday, the day we traveled down here, and a second time at my brother's wedding.  They have also come down to visit too.   I have yet to get to do much with friends, but I seriously have to get a move on that.  Schedules are so hard to co-ordinate. 
     Paul and I have had to leave for 1 to 3 day meetings here and there.  God keeps providing childcare  for these meetings.  My dear sister-n-law all the way from Michigan is a life saver.  Our good friend from The Dalles with her daughter.  My mommy ;).  And soon my newest sister-n-law.  I hate asking for so much help, but here I am, the one in need, and God is meeting that need through these fine ladies, and making me take a hard look at my independant streak.  Plus... Paul and I have really started enjoying our little "honeymoons" away from the children.  

This is what the LORD says: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my good promise to bring you back to this place.  For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you."
-Jeremiah 29:10-12
    
    

Packing...

Most of our packing was done, but the day after we got our Marching Orders, we finished up and packed the whole day long after a breakfast of buttermilk pancakes, eggs and ham. 

Most of the kids worked hard most of the time.  ;)

We have a system... everything starts fine and dandy.  Joy and excitement, singing and dancing fill the air. Tossing things here and there, lots of "yes moms" and "yes dads".  Helpful brothers and sisters.  Sweet talks. Thankful-for lists of The Dalles.  Talks of our new appointment, new ministry, new people, 

new city, new house, new cars, etc...

stir up hope in all of us. 

And then... a few hours into it, when weariness and overwhelming-ness  take over,

we settle quickly into our all too familiar flesh.....

I start throwing stuff away, the kids start protesting, I say "Where in the world did all this stuff come from?"  "Who left a banana under the bed?"  "What did I just step in?"  "I didn't know cheesesticks could get this hard."  and "THERE is my black flip-flop I've been missing since last summer!  How did it get up there?!?"   Then someone's crying that now they don't want to move and I have to psycho-analyze, only to find out that my child just doesn't want to pack.   Paul's scowl deepens. 

Chaos begins to creep in and take over the loving-order that the Lord had so easily begun our day with.

STOP THE SHOW!

Deep breaths,

pray together, ("yes Ann I know Elijah has his eyes open,

but how would you know unless your eyes were open too?")

and make some fun....

What to do with an empty, freshly scrubbed toy chest????

 

We pack, and Paul carries the boxes downstairs to the garage.

This box had a special surprise in it.

I think Paul caught on though because there were giggles around the box.

So the joke was on David.

Paul picked it up, without giving David a chance to jump out with his "SURPRISE!".

And instead, David screamed with cries for help, which we all ignored.

After Paul finished his "Incredible-Hulk-Box-Crushing-Scene"...

he set David down and squeezed Elijah's nose.  

Then we all seriously considered taping up Elijah

and putting him with the rest of the boxes in the garage.

But we love him too much,

and what would our family be

if we were missing even one...

incomplete.

Thank you Lord, for the fullness You give me.